This is such a big topic that I want to share with you as I feel so many of us get stuck in this trap at some point. We get so focused on what is going on in other people’s lives, always talking about our opinion on an event or what someone else is doing. At some point we have said to ourselves or to a friend “why do I always attract the drama?”. If this is you, maybe it’s time to start setting boundaries.
When you are in one of these cycles, ask yourself ‘have I been focusing on myself lately and how I can become a better version of me?’
This only stops when you start reflecting on how you live your own life. When you start looking inwards at what you are doing, you stop focusing on other people lives. You will realise that these certain events or the people you are comparing yourself to don’t matter, you are what matters.
Ways to realise you might be becoming too focused on others:
- Comparing yourself to what others are doing
- When you catch up with your friends the conversation always comes back to other people and their lives (in a negative way)
- Always having to explain your opinion on an event that has happened
If you surround yourself with people who you think ‘attract the drama’, you can start creating boundaries. If they want you to have an opinion on someone or an event, don’t give them one.
Try turning the topic to something else. The more you push it away the more they will stop asking. If you feel they aren’t doing that, then this is where you might have an honest conversation and say along the lines ‘I think we are speaking a lot about ‘such and such’ and I want us to start focusing more on us and what we’re doing’. It doesn’t need to be nasty; you’re just creating a boundary for yourself.
Also don’t be hard on yourself if you feel you are doing this! The hardest step is realising what you are doing, acknowledging it and wanting to become more focused on you.
You have got this! I believe in YOU!